After a tornado, children may feel scared, confused, clingy, angry, withdrawn or worried that another storm will happen. According to Wendy Hill, MD, a pediatrician with ThedaCare Physicians Pediatrics-Neenah, these reactions are common after a frightening event. Parents and caregivers can help children recover by offering safety, routine, reassurance and support.
“It will take many kids some time to process this type of trauma, but with careful, ongoing steps, adults can help children through their fears and guide them to a sense of restored normalcy,” Dr. Hill says.
Start with these steps.
Offer a sense of safety and calm reassurance
“Children look to adults to understand how serious a situation is,” Dr. Hill says. “Speak calmly, even if you are upset.”
Let them know:
- “You are safe right now.”
- “The tornado is over.”
- “Adults are working to fix the damage.”
- “We have a plan for where to go if there is another warning.”
Keep explanations simple and age-appropriate
Young children do best with short, repeated reassurance. Older children may need more details, but they still benefit from calm and clear information.
“Trauma can make the world feel unpredictable,” Dr. Hill says. “Routines help children feel grounded. Try to keep regular times for meals, sleep, schoolwork, play and family time, even if your family is staying somewhere else temporarily.”
Consider:
- Small routines matter. Reading before bed, eating breakfast together or walking the dog can help children feel that life is becoming steady again.
- Let children talk, but don’t force it. Some kids will want to talk about what happened, and others may need time. Younger children may express feelings through play, drawing or repeated questions, and that is normal.
- Shield children from too much technology and storm coverage. After a disaster, repeated videos, photos, news alerts and social media posts can make kids feel like the tornado is happening again.
- Avoid giving children responsibilities that feel too heavy, such as worrying about money, insurance or major repairs.
Ease worries about school
If a child’s school was damaged, they may worry about friends, teachers, routines or whether school will ever feel normal again. Be honest, but reassuring. You may say:
- “The school building was damaged, but adults are checking it and making a safe plan.”
- “You may go to a different place for school for a while.”
- “Your teachers and school leaders will tell families what happens next.”
“Children’s trauma reactions can improve with time, safety and support. It’s important to give them simple ways to regain control,” Dr. Hill says.
One strategy is to give kids small choices and safe ways to help, including picking out clothes, snacks or a bedtime book; drawing thank-you cards for helpers; choosing a favorite toy to keep nearby; and practicing a family storm plan.
Watch for symptoms
Signs that your child is struggling may not always be obvious. While some kids may cry or worry outwardly, others may keep their emotions in. Symptoms may show up as:
- Irritability, emotional outbursts and defiance. This might look like snapping or getting upset over what would normally be something small. “While these can be normal behaviors, especially for tweens and teens, such outbursts also can be a sign that your child is dealing with something more,” Dr. Hill says.
- Silence, withdrawal or emotional numbing. On the flip side, you may see your child shut down in times of stress. “They may tell you they’re fine when you ask them what’s wrong, but you know they’re going through something,” Dr. Hill says. “You can gently offer your presence and support, and tell them you’re here when they’re ready to talk.”
- Physical symptoms and trouble sleeping. Children and teens who are not managing their emotions may complain of headaches, stomachaches, fatigue or nausea. They also may experience nightmares or have trouble falling or staying asleep. “Stress and anxiety produce cortisol, which can trigger these symptoms,” Dr. Hill says. “Complicated emotions can lead to physical symptoms.”
Seek help if needed
First, remember children recover best when caregivers also have support. Parents should try to rest, eat, take breaks from disaster news, accept help, and talk with friends and loved ones. It is OK for children to see that adults have feelings, but they also need to see them finding support and taking steps forward.
“Some children need extra help after trauma,” Dr. Hill says. “Parents should seek support if symptoms continue for several weeks, interfere with daily life or seem to get worse.”
Your child’s pediatrician or family medicine physician is here to help. As a trusted adult in your child’s life, they can offer reassurance and assess your child’s symptoms. If needed, they can refer you to resources such as behavioral health counseling.
“Our community has experienced a collective trauma,” Dr. Hill says. “With many caring people banding together, we can show kids the way through the trauma of this frightening event.”
Support starts with a conversation. Talk with your child’s pediatrician.
